tanggungjawab

yeah, i'm happy today... finally telekom has replaced the telephone cabel after 2 weeks of 'no-phone-line-in-tamansepadu'.. whoever stole the cabel is sooo irresponsible.. they made easy money from a haram source! n telah menyusahkan telekom malaysia n the whole penduduk taman sepadu particularly (in this case).. i read from newspaper today that telekom (TM) lose rm5 mil because of stolen cabel, that is only in perak. so just imagine,there r 14 states in malaysia, times 5mil, n how much TM would loose.. dahla TM memang x byk profit these few years.. how can they replace the stolen cabels as soon as possible? whoever stole the cabel mmg sgt x bertanggungjawab (repeated).. kat dunia mmg drg selamat tp di akhirat x tentu lg tau.. eeii.. (sorry ter-emo sket. ye r, memandangkan my father used to work with TM before, hehe)

to FIQAH: happy 21st birthday!! moga panjang umur murah rezeki.. makin besar, makin byk tanggungjawab kena pikul, as a student, a child, and hamba Allah..

talking about responsibility, being anak sulung in the family, byk tanggungjawab kena pikul. i hav to be a good role model, what i mean is the best role model! in studies, in moral. sumtimes, when i achieved a lot in studies, i thought it would be a burden for the rest of family, including my cousins. all my uncles n aunties will expect their children to be as good as me in their studies. even my mom would compare my lil bro n lil sister wif me. i feel kesian when they got 'scolded' when their results were not that good. some of my cousins even said, 'ye la, **** bukan farah' when my auntie asked him/her to pujuk opah buy ticket for them for holiday. when i asked bout their spm/pmr/upsr result, they'll say 'ye la, aku x pandai mcm kau'. tu yg mls nk tnya result org tu. sbb i know, me myself dun like ppl asking bout my result.. do i like being address like that? nope.. am i a 'cucu/anak emas' in the family? nope, i dun think so. am i born intelligent? hmm.. i think everybody has their own strength. i hav to work hard to achieve these. they didn't come easily like some people. some people do score even though they didn't really study. that is pure intelligent. but mine is not. my point is, it is not easy to get what we want in life, we have to work hard for it, be responsible to ourselves, n insyaAllah, Allah will help those who helped themselves. but make sure it is for good reason la.

hm, countdown to new year 2007; another 4 days. dah ada azam baru? sy berazam nk study harder; for sem5 exam.. cuak sey.. so, yok ramai2 study renal! ahaqs!

DRAGON RIDER, i'm not

yeah..just finishing repro system.. the exm was quite ok but I was so tensed with the questions.. there were quite a number of Qs coming from pbl.. argh.. moral of the story, do ur pbl properly. i think they want to implement pbl work in our exam so that it's useful.. hmmphh..

after the exam, azi, nabia, izzah n me went to klcc.. hm, last time i went there was when usu coming back to msia, like what, in july/aug? haha.. quite long time huh.. everytime i go to klcc, i'll think of usu.. miss her so much, n her kids.. when r they coming home again? ok, back to our day out.. i planned to watch ERAGON muvi ever since i fisrt saw the trailer.. (i just luv magic! can't help it.. it started with enid blyton story books la.. too much reading her books makes me hooked to magic muvies/books.. n harry potter too! <- usu's influence.. hehe..) the muvi was quite good though it is slow-paced.. i hav to wait for the sequel, cos it's a trilogy! jus bare with me if u hear 'eragon', 'the land of alagaesia', 'dragon rider', 'galbatorix', 'verdan' many times in this coming few weeks... err, who wants to give me dragon as a pet? hehe...

luv this movie! but still cannot beat harry potter ;)

las wednsdy ijat messaged me while i was studying; 'farah, tau tak rumah opah kt kg kene pecah masuk masa opah kt kl?' i was like, huh? how would i know.. since usu left for london, i am the last person to know any news/gath.. if not, i'll be among the first.. so i msg my mom telling her bout this hoping that she'll call me back. hehe.. but she only called me the next day, telling that opah's house not that teruk. every ceiling in every room was broken.. not so many things were stolen, money bout rm1000 gone..luckily the thieves didn't found opah's jewelleries.. she hid them sumwhere that no1 knows.. funny though to know where she hid them. now, opah is in kl..tonite there'll b a gath at uncle besar's house..ada sate.. should i go or shouldn't i? hmmph..

REFLECTION

*Reflection*

Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you'll never know me
Every day
It's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where
I Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection
Someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that
I'm Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

There's a heart that must be
Free to fly
That burns with a need to know
The reason why

Why must we all conceal
What we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that
I'm Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

this song tells my feeling rite now.. i luv this song, primarily becoz i luv MULAN movie (u shud watch it, it shows girl power!).. n becoz of the lyrics also.. so true, rite? sumetimes, we dun really know who we r, is it really truly us in the mirror? we shud know it better.. maybe poeple around us know who we r; physically n from their perspective. but do they really know us deep down inside? cos sumtimes I also dun even know myself.. ya, I am farah.. apart from that? hm.. then, the best solution is, muhasabah balik diri.. wut did i do today? yesterday? in the past? why i did it? was it really beneficial or just wasting my time? wut i'm doing now? why i want to b a doctor? <- I always questioning myself.. is it because i want to help people? or for the money n pangkat? hmm.. wut i know, i always wanted to be a doctor since i was in primary school. i want to be d first doctor in my family :)

oh ya, las nite was Friday Night show, an annually event in imu. it was nice to watch imu students singing, dancing, play instruments. but it was nicer to watch lecturers performing!! Dr. Joe n Jenny Pereira danced, Dr. Rajesh n his wife sang 'kabhi alvida na kehna', Dr. JPJ n Dr. Srikumar were in a band. not to forget, my beloved tutor, a.k.a the famous Dr. Francis Achike sang an oldies song!! haha.. klakar tol! all in all, quite ok la. jus the backdrop wasn't ok. the words fell down a few times. from FRIDAY nite, became FIA nite. FIA a.k.a Francis Ifejika Achike!! haha..

hmm.. wut did i crap here..maybe this is pre-exam depression, exaggerated by loneliness.. i'm alone rite now, shkn n fiq went home, fiza is bz wif her NHSD, n azi is sumwhere in IMU.. adui, malasnye nak study..!